heathesaurus

Although I rent my apartment in Brooklyn, I do not have a home. My parents are still my home. I am part of a vast generation of people who perpetually live as if they just graduated from college. I am 38. I wear a backpack and I have no savings. I console myself with the thought that people live longer now, so it makes sense that some of us may take longer to mature.

therichgirlsareweeping:

—JONATHAN AMES (via youmightfindyourself:tobia / NYTimes)

Let’s talk about this quote for a moment, shall we? First of all, this piece is from 2002. 2002! This attitude was a little more forgiveable then; we were all still blinky and disoriented after 9/11.

But! It’s almost 2010. When Ames wrote this article, he was 38. Now that would make him well into his mid-40’s now. And he’s gained a modicum of success in the intervening years, leading up to the new HBO show “Bored to Death,” starring Jason Schwartzmann as a stand-in for Ames himself, it seems —  a sensitive, tiresome child-man who bumbles through life with no real purpose other than knowing that he has no purpose. Ames, now that he’s firmly staring down middle age, is still condoning enabling the man-child behavior of his generation, and the one after.

I’m paraphrasing Pinkie here (she alerted me to the post I’ve reblogged via a crabby email), but if anyone’s wondering why I’m (or she) is still single — this is it. So many of the men I know are the walking embodiment of Ames’ story — and it just seems to be getting more and more common the older I get.

I want to be an adult, why doesn’t anyone else? Or do they, and they’re just afraid to? Or don’t know how? Or can’t break away from the financial support of their parents? Or can’t figure out what they’re “supposed” to do because they can’t do what their parents did? (Namely, get married in their early 20’s, get a career track job, buy a house in the suburbs and have a 2.5 children and a dog?)

Whatever the reason, it’s a scary prospect, growing up with no viable template to follow. Yes, we all have no savings — yes, still. That’s one of the things from Ames’ 2002 piece that hasn’t changed. Because instead of having to deal with a catastrophic war, or major social upheaval — the only outstanding feature of our lifetimes is a chain of economic disasters. Just when you feel you’ve finally got your feet under you, the rug is pulled out — and there goes your 401k, your minscule nest egg, your hopes for a secure future.

I can’t even begin to think how long it’s going to take many of us to recover from this latest round of monetary bullshit. How many people do you know who took the plunge and tried to do what they were “supposed to” — and bought a house they couldn’t afford and are now dealing with or facing down an adjustable-rate mortgage that is crushing (or will crush) them financially? Or who can’t even begin to pay back all the credit card debt they accrued in the early/mid aughts, thanks to ever-increasing interest rates that won’t be helped by the too-little-too-late Credit Card Act?

Its easy to see why people our age stay locked in a state of perpetual childhood. But we don’t have to settle for that life. We can do better.